Today you should read: Song of Solomon 5
This chapter is the only chapter of this love story where we see the reality of a good biblical marriage and that’s this: Christ may be in the center but it’s two sinners married to each other and things (even in good Christian marriages) aren’t going to be all romance, poetry, and good sex when you have to use fruit and animals as illustrations.
In this chapter we see Solomon coming home late and trying to get into his bedroom to see his wife and that he is quite excited to see her. However, for whatever reason, she does not feel the same toward him. All of that talk in the last chapter about necks looking like ivory towers to climb, breasts looking like two fawns to prance in the field with, and having their pick of each other’s choicest fruits, has been forgotten as we read of a husband knocking hard on a locked door to make love with his wife. Instead she comes up with excuses about why she won’t let him in. Excuses such as… she doesn’t want to dirty her feet and that she’d have to put her clothes on (which according to his interests in v. 2, really should not be a problem). Later she feels bad and finally answers the door only to see that he has gone. She then goes out to search for her beloved complimenting him in the remainder of the chapter.
I don’t know about you, but as a husband who tries his best to be a leader, sacrificial lover, protector and provider, I am quite relieved to read this chapter because I know that I fall short in my marriage and these roles. In Danny Akin’s (president of Southeastern Seminary) book God on Sex, I relate well with Solomon in that she was probably upset with him already for either not coming home on time or being a king and having to put other priorities over her. There’s much to read into here but we know that Mr. Husband of many wives and concubines failed in this role many times in his life and God still used him to write a book on what a biblical marriage can and should look like, even in the hard times. His wife is obviously convicted for her excuses and actions as v. 4 says, her heart “seethed” and she soon ran after him.
So after reading through the one chapter where we see that even the “perfect” marriage is really not so perfect here are a few questions we can ask ourselves concerning our marriages or future marriages:
1.Am I person of my word? Are you home when you tell your spouse you’ll be home? Do you do what you say that you’ll do?
2.Do I make excuses? As a spouse, are you a person who will make excuses to try to get out of lovemaking instead of communicating what’s wrong? As a potential future spouse do you make excuses instead of communicating the hurt or need?
3. Do I try to make our wrongs right? “Immediately the wife chased after her husband trying to make her wrong right.” Do you extend grace freely in your marriage? Do you seek and ask for repentance when wrong?
Posted by:Erik Koliser